Pied-à-terre or not to Pied-à-terre

We retrieve the key to the apartment, go to the apartment...trying not to make eye contact with anyone we see.

Let me list the negatives:

1. We have to hide that we are there
2. Find the apartment....it is in the basement
• Had I known this, it would have been an automatic deal breaker
3. Get into the apartment
• apparently it used to be 2 apartments but had been split into 2, now it is so small that my son (he is 6'0") can stand in the center of the room and touch both walls
• Other people clothes are still in the closet
• For a room that is supposed to accommodate 4 (there's only 3 of us) there is only 1 futon and a mattress that is supposed to go on the floor in the only space available once the futon is opened....between the front door and the bathroom.
4. The bathroom is small, but doable...it is Europe
• But, there is a hole in the wall from the shower that goes into the main room. So everyone can hear and possibly smell whatever you do in there. Classy.
5. The internet doesn't work.
6. The cable doesn't work.
7. The "fan" is a ventilation fan which provides no heat relief
• Had brought a back-up fan just in case, but it worked off a 110 volt and the apartment had 220 volt plugs. Fan burned out in 60 seconds.

Let me list the positives:

1. It is next to Les Invalides
2. The neighborhood is beautiful
3. The building is beautiful

That's it.

I try to call the landlord, no answer. I email the landlord (part of preparation is having contact info...important), she emails back to tell me that she cannot come by because she is out of town and emails me instructions on how to connect the internet. She says due to new Paris laws, cable doesn't work in that building but we can watch TV online.

First, it is not my job to fix the internet. Second, it is presumptuous to think I brought a computer to watch TV online. Finally, I cannot watch TV online because the internet doesn't work.

I try to fix the internet. I'm good with computers, the instructions did not work and she said it should work. Shouda, coulda, woulda. She should have made sure it was working before she left town. I told her that I would just rather stay somewhere else and wanted out of our agreement, she refused then stopped  answering my emails. I contacted AirBNB and let them know the situation. They tried to contact her to no avail then called me back to say that they do not agree with landlords being unavailable to both them and to tenants. I asked if they could just refund my money so that I could find another place. They said they could not as long as the apartment was according to the specifications in the agreement. In the meantime, because they could not get in touch with her, they found us a nearby hotel to stay for the night while they check things out (Le Jardins Eiffel). Price, 200EU per night.